The Bandaged Poissonnier

"His mastery of fish-flesh would make an emperor weep."

The Bandaged Poissonnier is the best cook in Venderbight and beyond, well known for the amazing cooking skills he possesses as well as his use of very eccentric ingredients.

Sacrificed for Art

“To be edible, is to be possible to be consumed. And to be living, is to consume. Thus we find that the nature of the unliving is to be consumed. In fact, therefore, anything that is not living may be consumed - ”

The Poissonnier spent his early days on the Surface, where he achieved great renown and was known to serve the royal families of Europe. After the fall of London he served meals for the Empress's children, until the royal issue started to prefer their food freshly slain... or alive. He took off for the Khanate, where he served as personal chef for the great Khan; while there, he married the niece of a high-ranking member of the Taimen clan, and had a son with her. Alas, the Khan's growing fixation on having horse milk curds in every meal began to make the Poissonnier bored; when his whipped jillyfleur dish was sent back, the cook, with his pride damaged, immediately left the Khanate without even saying goodbye to his family. Despite his pride and his dedication to the art of cooking, the Poissonnier still sometimes misses his wife and son, and observes their lives from a distance.

Nowadays, the Bandaged Poissonnier, who has become a tomb-colonist in his old age, owns a highly recommended restaurant in Venderbight called The Vengeance of Jonah. He can sometimes be found working in other establishments, particularly during Hallowmas in London.

The Poissonnier's views on food and edibility are highly eccentric; he believes that anything that is not currently living may be consumed. As such, his ingredients of choice are similarly strange: peligin paste, spices from the Writhing River, even Fluke-cores. The Poissonnier is so skilled in his craft that his work resembles alchemy more than cooking, and makes use of bizarre appliances invented by the Poissonnier himself - for instance an athanor-stove, or a jugging-crucible.

The Seventh Miracle

"The diners lean back, bloated. When their senses return, they call for the Poissonnier and congratulate him upon impeccably reproducing the sensation of drowning in culinary form. "It was not drowning," the Fathomking says, his baritone rolling over their babble. "It was love." He raises his glass to the Poissonnier."

The Bandaged Poissonnier's greatest achievement is the creation of a grand, seven-course feast made for the Fathomking and his royal court. This feast, which follows the seven stages of turning into a Drownie, contains a taste that can be sensed by the heart itself, and has been described by the Fathomking himself as "love".

The seven courses of this drowning-feast are as follows:

1. "The First Touch on the Skin:" a plate of silky white flesh submerged in a yellow sauce that tastes extremely fresh and shocking;
2. "Struggling Against the Current:" a terrine of coursing flavors that leaves the diner watery-eyed;
3. "Swallowed!:" a peligin soup with a very deep and heavy taste;
4. "The Surface, High Above:" a mild, palate-cleansing mousse;
5. "Lost Breath:" a roulade of still-wriggling tentacles, bitter on the tongue's tip, but with a long, mellow aftertaste;
6. "The Abandonment of the Self:" spherical cages of solidified syrup that contain fiery sweetmeats and are then spun with sugar and salt;
7. "The Promise of What is to Follow:" a crème brûlée of inexplicable pungency, indescribably "more-ish."