F.F. Gebrandt

From The Fifth City Wiki
Revision as of 19:10, 6 February 2025 by Vanillian (talk | contribs)

"General consensus has it that she is Fallen London's greatest chemist. A substantial minority would say she is the city's most shrewd industrialist."[1]

F.F. Gebrandt is widely regarded as London's greatest chemist and industrialist.

Beyond her passion for chemistry, she harbors a keen interest in palaeontology,[2] a fact that became evident during her 1898 Mayoral Election campaign. Running under the slogan "Science Serving Society,"[3] her platform emphasized the use of scientific advancements—particularly in palaeontology and chemistry—to benefit the city's populace. As an initial step, she proposed the establishment of a museum dedicated to palaeontology, with grander ambitions of developing undead constructs to ease the burdens of the working class. Additionally, she envisioned reviving prehistoric creatures to serve as beasts of burden and for personal protection,[4]though she was careful to clarify that she did not intend to "bring dinosaurs back," but rather to advance palaeontological research.[5] Her hope was that the museum would provide education, spark interest, and drive scientific progress.[6]

When questioned about the potential for self-interest, she acknowledged the issue but dismissed it as an inherent part of democracy, pointing out that her opponents refused to even admit such a reality.[7] Her campaign was managed by a notable Aunt and a formidable squad of spinsters.[8]In a bid to rally support, she campaigned at the Bone Market[9] and distributed Augmented Electrostatic Machines to her backers—devices capable of converting mechanical energy into electrical energy.[10] Ultimately, she secured 32% of the vote, finishing second to the Viscountess of the Viric Jungle, who won with 42%.[11] She considered the loss a failure, both on her part and on London's.[12] Had she won, London would've experienced an economic and scientific boom, but Gebrandt eventually would've tired of the position, and abolished it entirely to go back to doing science,[13]

Despite her electoral defeat, Gebrandt fulfilled one of her campaign promises two years later. In the summer of 1899, she spearheaded the establishment of the Museum of Prelapsarian History in Veilgarden. This initiative, known as the Prelapsarian Exhibition, invited Londoners to transform an abandoned estate into a museum and contribute exhibits of historical, paleontological, and philosophical significance.[14]

However, the museum’s opening was marked by unforeseen consequences. Under the directive of The Empress, Gebrandt had constructed a time machine of sorts,[15] designed to summon an apparition of the Consort. When the machine overloaded, she attempted to intervene but was stopped by the Empress.[16] The resulting malfunction led to the sudden appearance of Second City structures in London and unleashed "ushabtiu"—animated stone constructs—throughout the city, causing widespread chaos.[17] Gebrandt quickly took control of the situation, calling upon the citizenry to assist in resolving the crisis.[18] She devised a plan to lure the ushabtiu through a mirror into Parabola, where they would cease to be London's problem. Manufacturing vast quantities of a specially formulated perfume,[19] she deployed it across the city, drawing the ushabtiu into Parabola before smashing the mirror to ensure they could not return.[20] Later, when questioned at the Fruits of the Zee Festival about her involvement in the incident, she deflected responsibility.[21]

Gebrandt remains deeply involved in scientific progress, frequently collaborating with notable researchers[22] to refine her tonic formulas.[23] She is the inventor of several renowned products, including F.F. Gebrandt's Tincture of Vigour, F.F. Gebrandt's Superior Laudanum, F.F. Gebrandt's Patent Illuminating Cap, F.F. Gebrandt's Patent Neathoscope, Containing and Displaying All Seven Colours of Exotic Light, F.F. Gebrandt's Cylindrical Phénakistiscope, F.F. Gebrandt's Verdant Stimulator, F.F. Gebrandt's Flame-Resilient Paper (created as a result of her reasearch on The Correspondence),[24] F.F. Gebrandt's Superior Postal Adhesive (needs a license to use),[25] F.F. Gebrandt's Superior Lager (apparently not very good)[26], Milk of Magnesia[27](a constipation medicine), and Incorruptible Biscuits.[28]

Her personal life is unconventional; she is in a platonic marriage of convenience with her best friend, ensuring that societal expectations do not hinder her scientific pursuits.[29] As a result, she is unbothered by dalliances outside of marriage.[30] Her business ventures are numerous, and she maintains extensive connections.[31][32] She has worked on Mr Spices's issue before.[33] Recently, she launched a new enterprise—F.F. Gebrandt’s Standard Aerial Transit Company[34]—offering airship tours to the Roof of the Neath.[35]

Gebrandt is an active public figure, frequently delivering lectures at the Department of Infernal Rarefactions, where she engages with attendees on scientific matters[36] and attends the occasional lectures herself.[37] She runs an advice column, offering medical and relationship guidance,[38] with questions selected to ensure broad applicability to her readership.[39] When overwhelmed, she employs ghostwriters to assist with responses, though all advice is subject to her final approval.[40] Her column subtly promotes her tonics, reinforcing her business interests.[41][42]

She has founded a "church," though it functions more as a gathering place for academics rather than a site of worship.[43] She once knew The Regretful Soldier and seemed wistful about him.[44] Could he be an old flame?

Her laboratory, located on the outskirts of the city, is infamous for its acrid aroma. There, she conducts experiments and meets with those who pique her interest.[45] Gebrandt used to work with Mr Wines, but has since become independent.[46] The Masters of the Bazaar still bother her for her expertise however. She dislikes the Masters.[47] IIt is implied that her rapid rise to prominence was due to their backing, but their coercion—particularly in forcing her to develop a love potion (which she abhorred and deliberately sabotaged)—led to her departure.[48] Her advice column was conceived as a response to this event.

Gebrandt harbors a disdain for Parabola, viewing it as antithetical to scientific principles. Consequently, her Parabolan reflection remains identical to her real self.[49]

Her dedication to scientific progress is encapsulated in her belief that "science is a team pursuit." She rejects the notion of the lone genius, advocating instead for collaboration as the true driver of societal advancement.[50]

Her engagement with the city extends beyond academia. During the Coilheart Games, she collaborated with the Tigers to host a yard sale[51] and served as a judge in a Tournament of Intellect side competition.[52] At the annual Fruits of the Zee Festival on Mutton Island, she established a traveling exhibition to promote the Prelapsarian Exhibition and conduct toxicological research.[53] She invited festival-goers to assist in experiments replicating the unique properties of Mutton Island’s well water, assessing its viability as a commercial product—unconcerned with its sacred status.[54]

References

  1. ↑ Rely on F.F. Gebrandt. Fallen London
  2. ↑ Get her opinion on your research, Fallen London "F.F. Gebrandt is keenly interested in palaeontology, and is not afraid to bring her many hypotheses to bear on your present study."
  3. ↑ Learn more about F.F. Gebrandt's platform, Fallen London
  4. ↑ F.F. Gebrandt (Election Candidate), Fallen London "F.F. Gebrandt has commandeered a public house and made herself available to those who wish to discuss her candidacy. [...] "We will start with a museum, [...] be able to supplement skeletons with living muscles. [...] living extinct beasts [...]"
  5. ↑ Learn more about F.F. Gebrandt's platform, Fallen London "[…] "London is on the cusp of a breakthrough, and, as Mayor, I can ensure that it happens." […] […] Will she really bring dinosaurs to London? […] "That's getting a little ahead." […] I'd enable advances in the palaeontological field. […]""
  6. ↑ Discover her plans for London (F.F. Gebrandt), Fallen London "[…] people, they are inventive. […] always someone eager to experiment, desperate to learn. I'm going to help them." […] "I'm going to nurture the flame of London's imagination. Provide palaeontological education – to start with, a museum […]"
  7. ↑ Ask F.F. Gebrandt if the Mayorship wouldn’t be a conflict of interest, Fallen London "F.F. shrugs [...] "That is [...] one of the failures of democracy [...]" "[...] my belief in what would benefit the town is certainly influenced by my own interests [...] the other candidates haven't the introspection even to realise this [...]""
  8. ↑ Choose F.F. Gebrandt as your candidate, Fallen London "Your Aunt is managing F.F. Gebrandt's campaign. She marshals a squad of spinsters […] Even constables quail before them, letting them stick posters up in entirely illegal places. […] Your Aunt herself pins the rosette to your collar […]"
  9. ↑ Show F. F. Gebrandt around your Stall, Fallen London "She is making a campaign visit to the Bone Market, assuring seller and buyer alike that she will bring the study of Palaeontology to new heights. There is much talk of the Museum."
  10. ↑ An Augmented Electrostatic Machine, Fallen London "[…] The bolts of lightning […] should be harmless, but an earlier visitor returned from the boatman with their hair entirely on end. […] It takes five porters to carry […] "This will be a damn sight easier when she comes through on those prehistoric lifters," […]"
  11. ↑ Election 1898: Statistics, Failbetter Games "The Viscountess won with 42% of the vote, over F.F. Gebrandt’s respectable 32% and the Rubbery Entrepreneur’s 25%."
  12. ↑ Take Tea with F.F. Gebrandt, Fallen London "I meant everything I said during the Mayoral campaign, you know." […] You wonder aloud if she has any regrets. "Regrets? I failed, I suppose. I don't really think of it in those terms. Maybe London failed me. Maybe we failed each other."
  13. ↑ Have a word with F.F. Gebrandt (The Waswood), Fallen London "[…] you see […] London […] awash with the effluvia of enterprise, its boutiques, chemists and pharmacies flooded with new and ever more daring products. […] she abolishes the position as her final act, to ensure she is not disturbed from her laboratory again."
  14. ↑ F.F. Gebrandt's Prelapsarian Exhibition, Failbetter Games "F.F. Gebrandt CORDIALLY INVITES All Londoners to participate in the Raising of a New Museum of Prelapsarian History & accompanying Exhibition, to put on Display Curiosities Historical, Palaeontological, & Philosophical."
  15. ↑ Watch as Gebrandt explains her machine, Fallen London
  16. ↑ Watch, yet more furtively, Fallen London
  17. ↑ A Careful Stroll Around the Neighbourhood, Fallen London
  18. ↑ Hear her call to action, Fallen London "[…] one must make the obvious connection to the emergence of prelapsarian architecture around London." […] "To fight this new menace, we must understand it. […] I have some ideas. But most of the knowledge we need is out there – I need your help finding it.""
  19. ↑ Cover your nose, Fallen London
  20. ↑ Stay and watch what happens, Fallen London
  21. ↑ Listen for F.F.'s answer, Fallen London "F.F.'s voice […] is frosty. "[…] the events […] had […] little to do with the Exhibition itself, being largely perpetuated by […] third parties, and solved by science […]. The museum is a successful monument to […] knowledge, and one which I stand behind wholeheartedly.""
  22. ↑ Invite F.F. Gebrandt to Collaborate, Fallen London [...] She was clearly expecting you to call on her. "I can't say no to a collaborator with your... particular breadth of expertise." She's staring at a liquid in a flask – no, eyeing you through the reflection [...]
  23. ↑ Aid F.F. Gebrandt in Refining her Formulas, Fallen London "You work well together, and she seems happy with your progress, even though the improvements are minute; tiny amounts of reagents saved here or there, small increases in purity. How much Tincture of Vigour does she sell each year?"
  24. ↑ Converse on the Correspondence, Fallen London "The flameproof paper was originally born out of necessity. I wonder if I should have put it on the market – it only gives people even more unwise ideas."
  25. ↑ Descend (The Abyssal Depths), Fallen London "Living gills pump fresh air into the diving-bell. […] Until the metal begins to buckle. […] Nineteen, twenty – more bolts popping; more noxious caulk […] What is that caulk? "F.F. Gebrandt's Superior Postal Adhesive […] Illegal without a licence, obviously.""
  26. ↑ Buy a round of F.F. Gebrandt's Superior Lager, Fallen London "Gebrandt's attempts […] have met with mixed results; patrons grimace […] as they sip their lager – but sip they do. You don't catch much of the conversation, though; a Garrulous Drunk waves his way through the tables to sit at your ear and talk."
  27. ↑ Send him out to the dispensary, Fallen London "You're in luck. The pharmacist has a stock of Mrs Gebrandt's new remedy, Milk of Magnesia. A spoonful later, your terrier is much restored. Enough to tell you something he learned while acquiring the hangover in the first place."
  28. ↑ Secure a shipment of dubiously preserved food, Fallen London "Gebrandt's biscuits are the most impervious food in the market: […] in the mouth, they shatter into shards that scratch and claw at your palate. The mushrooms (preserved into tins and heated until they become mush) are similarly permanent."
  29. ↑ Ask F.F. to share a confidence (The Waswood), Fallen London "[…] F.F. Gebrandt invites you to her house […] "My dear? Tea?" […] Her husband? […] "It has been a useful convenience. Our 'marriage' meant I could pursue my studies unharrassed […] It's not much of a lie. He is my closest friend, and the person I trust the most. […]"
  30. ↑ Seduce her!, Fallen London "[…] The afternoon turns to evening […] in a haze of pleasure […]. You even learn what F.F. stands for. […] Mrs Gebrandt confides that she has grown tired of the Masters' attention. She is thinking of cutting them a little more of her business […]"
  31. ↑ Discuss business – yours, specifically, Fallen London "Of course, if you're looking for a good source of lamplighter wax, you want to avoid the sellers who supply the University. I can put you in touch with a merchant who brings a shipment of the stuff from Apis Meet every three months..."
  32. ↑ Enter an agreement for the production of steel, Fallen London "Gebrandt has an arrangement with the Iron & Misery company – she can synthesize the reagents needed to refine Surface-grade steel, but she will not reveal her method to them. […] she will allow you to purchase some of the […] output at a steep discount..."
  33. ↑ Rely on her knowledge of chemistry, Fallen London "F.F. Gebrandt is […] knowledgeable and helpful on chemical matters. Though on the subject of Mr Spices' tears she is almost too knowledgeable, making a few leaps of logic that prove to be correct, but seem unsupported by the evidence before you."
  34. ↑ F.F. Gebrandt's Standard Aerial Transit Company, Fallen London
  35. ↑ Converse at the edge of a precipice, Fallen London "She hands you a recent edition of the Gazette. […] columns of uninterrupted Roof coverage. […] probably written entirely from a garret near Doubt Street. […] "London is […] on the precipice of a new fad: Roof mania. When that arrives, I want to be selling tickets. […]"
  36. ↑ The Charming of F.F. Gebrandt, Fallen London "F.F. Gebrandt is giving a rare public lecture at the Department of Infernal Rarefactions. Perhaps you should attend and meet her."
  37. ↑ Would you care to give a guest lecture?, Fallen London "The students are keen. The staff are coolly intrigued by your theories. F.F. Gebrandt may be in the audience."
  38. ↑ Help Mrs Gebrandt answer her correspondence, Fallen London "F.F. Gebrandt receives many requests for medical information - and also for help with less scientific problems. It's a busy time of year. A number of ghost-writers have been drafted in to help."
  39. ↑ Write to F.F. Gebrandt 2, Fallen London "In veiled terms. Very veiled terms. She answers advice columns for the papers, and whatever she says in reply to you must be suited to any readership."
  40. ↑ Be sympathetic, Fallen London "You draft a letter suggesting that the young lady simply ask her fiancé […] 'That will never do,' says Mrs Gebrandt. 'If people start behaving like that, I shall never sell any […] There's no arguing against this agenda."
  41. ↑ Be cruel to be kind 1, Fallen London "Your reply is full of dire warnings about this kind of scandalous conduct – and hints that the writer should stock up on F.F. Gebrandt's sal volatile forthwith, as a countermeasure against the fainting fits she is so evidently prone to."
  42. ↑ Write to F.F. Gebrandt, Fallen London "Mrs Gebrandt - or one of her ghost-writers - replies to your letter in a very timely fashion. And in amongst the veiled barbs and thinly disguised advertisments for tonics and tinctures nestle a few nuggets of genuine wisdom."
  43. ↑ Make a substantial donation to F.F. Gebrandt's church, Fallen London "It's more like a university common room than a vicarage. But Mrs Gebrandt is pleased at your generosity. Would you like to assist with a small experiment?"
  44. ↑ Stay up all night talking science with F.F. Gebrandt, Fallen London "...there was someone once, you know. Splendid fellow. Amazing moustache. He went off and joined the cavalry. Heard he got married too. So did I, as it happened. Wonder where he is now."
  45. ↑ F.F. Gebrandt and You, Fallen London "You call upon Mrs F.F. Gebrandt at her acrid-smelling laboratory on the outskirts of the city."
  46. ↑ Tell her everything, Fallen London "F.F. Gebrandt […] confides that she parted ways with Mr Wines […]. She also offers a secret: anything Mr Wines sells as 'absinthe' is likely no such thing. It is its code for products that are harmful to their drinkers."
  47. ↑ Do the bidding of Mr Wines, Fallen London "Mr Wines, the Master of the Bazaar who deals in drinks and entertainment, has asked after the health and happiness of Mrs Gebrandt. However, it also wants her to share her scientific advances with the Masters." "You and F.F. Gebrandt are getting along famously until the Masters are mentioned. She has no kind words for them, […] describes them in terms uncommonly heard from a lady. You won't advance Mr Wines' cause today, but you could always call again later."
  48. ↑ Reach into a secret memory of F.F. Gebrandt, Fallen London "[…] In a letter to 'Cuddy', F.F. responds: '[…] you are right about the ineffectiveness of my "Patented Love Potion". Have you not considered that this might be deliberate? […] […] if you're calling me an "old fraud", you better be calling me "old" to my face.'"
  49. ↑ Employ the Reflection of F.F. Gebrandt, Fallen London "F.F. Gebrandt – You can't for the life of you tell how her reflection is unlike herself; it is uncanny – vibrates with impatience. She doesn't like Parabola one bit. Measurements and data are slippery in Parabola. Weights shift. Distances squirm. […]"
  50. ↑ F.F. Gebrandt (Card), Fallen London "[…] F.F. is […] answering the more complex questions […]. Where her supporters are, so is she. "Science is a team pursuit," she says. "The lone genius nonsense is exactly that. We can only advance science, and thus society, together."
  51. ↑ F.F. Gebrandt's Hall of Recent History (Coilheart Games), Fallen London "Gebrandt's temporary sale […] has returned[…] the sign out front declares the venture 'IN COLLABORATION WITH THE RESPLENDENT COURT OF THE WAKEFUL EYE'. A Striped Overseer[…] watches over the takings […] Unsold trinkets and gewgaws from summers past fill the shelves. […]"
  52. ↑ Wander the sideshows (Intellect), Fallen London "F.F. Gebrandt is a judge in the 'contest alchemical', which takes place upon a gazebo-shaped patch of singed grass. It appears that a tobacconist from Rosegate is responsible [...]. Gebrandt – waving away smoke – appraises him from a safe distance."
  53. ↑ Speak to F.F. Gebrandt (Fruits of the Zee), Fallen London "I'm so glad you asked! An inquisitive mind is the trait I admire most in a person." [...] "My presence here serves a twofold purpose – to raise awareness for the Prelapsarian Exhibition, and to perform valuable toxicological research. [...]"
  54. ↑ Question the wisdom of the line of inquiry, Fallen London "What is sacred? Knowledge is sacred. There is nothing so holy as using the knowledge gained from […] inquiry to improve society's lot. […] this water – if the effects are replicable, we might make vital medicines delicious, or energise the melancholic."
Retrieved from "https://thefifthcity.wiki/w/index.php?title=F.F._Gebrandt&oldid=18782"