'''Mrs Plenty's Most Distracting Carnival''' is a year-round fair held in [[London]].
'''Mrs Plenty's Most Distracting Carnival''' is a year-round fair held in [[London]].
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Revision as of 04:29, 23 February 2025
"Well, the fire-eater is quite the show-woman. And those plate-spinners are rather amusing. But look - a monkey! Weren't you supposed to be doing something here? Never mind, it can wait a little longer. This place is most distracting."[1]
Mrs Plenty's Most Distracting Carnival is a year-round fair held in London.
Mrs Plenty's Carnival is located between Spite[3] and the Prickfinger Wastes,[4] and is owned and managed by the one and only Mrs Plenty.[5][6] Since the stuffy rules of polite society are less applicable when fun for all is involved, the Carnival allows Londoners from many disparate social circles to mingle freely.[7] The Carnival is both profitable and full of distracted patrons, so it is also an enticing target for pickpockets and other criminals.[8][9]
A carnival ticket.
The Carnival's stalls require tickets for admittance,[10] which are purchased with moon-pearls through a machine that dispenses tickets automatically.[11] Tickets may also be bought using souls,[12] and the cashier's tent has thousands stored away from customers.[13] The Carnival can be accessed from a path through the Prickfinger Wastes,[14] but the route is surrounded by dangerously sharp crystal formations. A single misstep may lead to a difficult death to recover from.[15]
The Big Top is the Carnival's main attraction. It boasts a variety of performing animals,[22][23] stunt artists,[24][25] and spectacles like caged tigers.[26] Even the Masters of the Bazaar sometimes visit, indistinguishably cloaked and under heavy guard.[27] Near the Carnival's outskirts are the Sideshows, a haunt of the less societally respectable; this area features various games,[28]weasel fighting pits,[29] further novelty performances,[30][31] and tattoo artists offering outlandish and risqué designs that are popular among zailors.[32][33]
Rubbery Lumps are the Carnival's most popular refreshment, though its version of the dish is not authentic.[34][35] Most of the other delights offered are of the fungal variety: spore-toffee,[36] pink moss-floss, toffee-puffballs.[37]
Other Attractions
"At MRS PLENTY'S CARNIVAL, ENJOY a DIVERTING EDUCATIONAL AND THRILLING RIDE into the CHASMIC ABYSMS of SUB-SUBTERRANEAN TROGLODYTRY! SEE the FOSSILS OF the ELDER PAST! ENJOY our PAINSTAKING RECREATION of the HELLS OF ANTIQUITY! (REFUNDS NOT AVAILABLE in case of UNWISE DEATH.)"[38]
"The NOTED PEDAGOGUE Mrs Plenty presents an INFORMATIVE and EDUCATIONAL EXHIBITION of ANATOMY and DANCES of ANTIQUITY for DISCERNING GENTLEFOLK. You will BE IMPROVED!"[39]
BENEATH THE NEATH
Beneath the Neath is a partially submerged Ferris wheel that descends into a cavern underground.[40] Passengers are first taken through a recreation of a classical Hades, then through a fire-and-brimstone Hell which may be staffed by actual devils. As the ride dives deeper, mysterious pulsations reverberate that evoke a heartbeat or breathing, and glowing, pony-sized slugs provide the only light. Soon after this interlude, the ride ascends back to the surface.[41]
The Most Educational Anatomy Exhibition is an exhibit staffed by various performers, including Miss Forward,[42]Mr Adoniform, and a tomb-colonist who is really Mr Adoniform wrapped in bandages.[43]Rubbery Men also perform here, but are often heckled by audience members.[44] They also do not approve of this attraction, and sometimes rescue their fellows from the exhibit in daring escapades.[45]
The House of Mirrors
"There are some things we were not meant to know, they say. But you wouldn't be down here if you took that seriously."
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"The House of Mirrors squats like an ape in a quiet corner of the carnival. Strange mirrors are labelled in a neat, scholarly hand. It is not a popular attraction."[46]
"No reflection! You look closer. Closer still. You stumble, and pitch face-first into the mirror... There is a sort of flickering behind your eyes, and everything seems different."[47]
The House of Mirrors is an unpopular attraction in an ignored part of the Carnival. It contains many labeled mirrors with unique, often dangerous, properties:[48]
Dream's Mirror
Dream's Mirror is decorated with bronze cats and silver lizards. It shows no reflection, but those who peer in far enough gain a new way to view the world - and a free stay at the Royal Bethlehem Hotel.[49]
Heart's Mirror smells of blood and dust. It also shows no reflection, but anyone who gazes in too deeply instantly dies.[50]
The Winged Mirror is made of of dark glass with a frame covered in black feathers. One corner is chipped and missing.[51] This mirror is associated with July of the Calendar Council.[52]
A mahogany-framed mirror is inscribed with beetles and tree-roots. Anyone who studies this mirror is sent to the Mirror-Marches.[53]
Be wary.
A bronze-framed mirror decorated with gargoyles is said to have been carved by a student of Dalou. The mirror's surface was supposedly forged from glim melted in the furnaces of the Brass Embassy. It is inscribed: BE WARY.[54]
An iron-framed mirror is said to have been forged from cannonballs from the Crimea, with a backing made from silverware stolen from a church. It has the inscription: BE UNDEFEATED.[55]
A gold-framed mirror is said to have been forged from idols stolen from the Pale Tabernacle, a place of "unearthly delights" spoken of by zailors. The mirror's inscription is unknown.[56][57]
A lapis-framed mirror has decorations supposedly from the Second City, though the mirror itself is recent and apparently scratched with claw marks. It is inscribed: LOOK BEHIND YOU.[58]
↑Have a chat in the shadow of the wheel, Fallen London"Catch Mrs Plenty when she nips around the side of the wheel for a smoke. [...] 'Gerrofoutofit, you. I've got a bleedin' carnival to run. Go on, sling yer hook.'"
↑Searching the heap of souls, Fallen London"The cashier's tent at Mrs Plenty's Most Distracting Carnival houses a vast pile of bottled souls. Thousands upon thousands of them."
↑...an incognito Master?, Fallen London"A hunched figure wrapped in a [...] cloak and cowl [...] A vigilant throng of neddy men menaces anyone coming too close."
↑The Sideshows, Fallen London"The ragged little tents around the edges of the carnival. Throw quoits! Bet on the shell game! Get a tattoo! Have your pocket picked five times in an hour!"
↑Meet some zailors, Fallen London"A gang of zailors is getting this week's tattoos. [...] They're keen to show off their latest decorations [...] a three-headed mermaid on fire."
↑Try the Rubbery Lumps, Fallen London"Now these are the real thing! Little hot gobbets of chewy, invigorating goodness!" (Storylet on Mutton Island, home of the real deal.)
↑Drinks at the Cock and Magpie, Sunless Sea"It's the well water, see [...] Can't make proper Rubbery Lumps without a proper well. [...] We look after the well here. Treat it right. And the Drowned Man looks after us."
↑Go for a ride, Fallen London"The first parts of the ride are decorated as underworlds. First a classical Hades [...] a dispirited-looking Charon without a river and a Tantalus who looks a little too well-fed. There follows a genuinely unsettling Hell decorated with smoky red grease-lamps and brass cages. [...] And are those real devils? [...] Then the ride descends deeper. [...] Even for one used to the Neath's dimness, the darkness is palpable and oppressive. [...] Deeper still. Phosphorescent slugs the size of ponies pulse in the darkness. [...] Almost too low to hear, a deep slow rhythm throbs. The heartbeat of some immense creature or a feature of the air moving in the chasm? You are not entirely sorry when the gondola starts moving upward. [...]"
↑Arrange an escape from the Carnival, Fallen London"Yet another Rubbery loiters at your door. As you pass, it gives you a moist Carnival flier. 'RUBBERY SPECIMEN! BONELESS WRITHING!' Its facefingers tap the paper sadly. [...] Locating the Rubbery Specimen at the Carnival is a simple matter [...] you grab the nearest tentacle and make a hasty get-away."
↑The House of Mirrors, Fallen London"The House of Mirrors squats like an ape in a quiet corner of the carnival. Strange mirrors are labelled in a neat, scholarly hand. It is not a popular attraction."
↑Gaze into Dream's Mirror, Fallen London"The mirror's frame is decorated with bronze cats and silver lizards. [...] No reflection! You look closer. [...] You stumble, and pitch face-first into the mirror... There is a sort of flickering behind your eyes, and everything seems different. [...] You have moved to a new area: A state of some confusion [...]"
↑Gaze into Heart's Mirror, Fallen London"The mirror smells of blood and dust. [...] No reflection! You look closer. Closer still. You stumble, and pitch face-first into the mirror... [...] You are lying on the cold hard ground. [...] You have moved to a new area: a slow boat passing a dark beach on a silent river [...]"
↑Lost in Reflections, Fallen London"Gaze into the Winged Mirror [...] Dark glass in a frame fringed with glossy black feathers. A single triangular fragment is missing from the top corner."
↑A mahogany-framed mirror, Fallen London"The mirror is burnished to a deep and treacherously sensuous sheen, carved with beetles and the twining roots of trees. [...] Look at your reflection [...] You have moved to a new area: The Mirror-Marches [...]"
↑A bronze-framed mirror, Fallen London"'The cavorting gargoyles round the frame are the work of a student of Dalou; the surface is not glass but glim, clarified in the Embassy furnaces...' An inscription in the frame reads: BE WARY.
↑An iron-framed mirror, Fallen London"'The frame of this mirror is cast from cannonballs recovered from the Crimea. Looted church silverware was melted to silver the glass.' An inscription in the frame reads: BE UNDEFEATED."
↑A gold-framed mirror, Fallen London"'The gold leaf of this mirror's frame was scraped from idols stolen from the Pale Tabernacle, or so claims...' You don't even read the rest of the label. You're looking at your reflection. Good God, you're gorgeous."
↑A lapis-framed mirror, Fallen London"'The insets date from the Second City, although the mirror and frame are of recent manufacture. Scratches on the mirror's surface might be claw-marks...' An inscription in the frame reads LOOK BEHIND YOU."